Best 747 of Woody Allen quotes - MyQuotes

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Woody Allen
By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

I don't want to live forever through my work. I want to live forever by not dying.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

There is an advantage in having a routine and working with the same people when you can and in writing as a regular thing and filming as a regular thing. That routine pays off for you. You get a lot of productivity that way, rather than sitting around waiting for inspiration and waiting for the perfect thing to happen. I would be much less productive that way.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

In certain areas I don't function well and in other areas I function very well. I'm very good professionally. I have good discipline, I'm able to write every day and do films and not go six times over the budget. I mean I'm a coherent person, but I also don't like to go through tunnels when I travel. I'm claustrophobic.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

I am an only child. I have one sister.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

There's no point in looking back, because there's nothing you can really do to improve the film. You can only aggravate and wish you had done stuff better.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Woody Allen

Raised by two mothers...wow, most of us barely survive one

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

To me, movies are valuable as an art form and as a wonderful means of popular entertainment. But I think movies have gone terribly wrong.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

For God sakes, this is a woman I was married to for 10 years. We made love. I'd hold her head over the toilet bowl when she threw up.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

You are much more dependent on luck than you think. People say if you want to have a good relationship, you have to work at it. But you never hear it about anything you really like, about sailing or going to soccer games.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

Tradition is the illusion of permanance.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

By now they had mastered my own language, but they still made simple mistakes, like using 'hermeneutics,' when they meant 'heuristic'.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

When one chooses to be a writer, psychologically there's a reason for that because you like the isolation and you like to be by yourself and you are by nature timid.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Woody Allen

Some people are funny, and some people are not funny. Many people who are not funny can make a living at it. You don't have to be great to make a living at it. Just like a doctor who doesn't have to be great can still make a living out of it.

By Anonym 19 Sep

Woody Allen

The most expensive sex is free sex

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

You look up after many years and you find that a film has become a classic because it's meaningful to people and alive, decade after decade.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

When you write the script, you're home in a room by yourself, and you're writing, and there's no connection with the real performing world. So you get a lot of things wrong and make a lot of mistakes and make a lot of bad choices.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

[An audience conditioned by a lifetime of television-watching is so corrupted that] their standards have been systematically lowered over the years. These guys sit in front of their sets and the gamma rays eat the white cells of their brains out!

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

Fantasy is only a state of mind that you can employ when existing in a real context.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

I don't know what I'm doing, but my incompetence has never stopped my enthusiasm.

By Anonym 16 Sep

Woody Allen

I took a speed-reading course where you run your finger down the middle of the page and was able to read "War and Peace" in 20 minutes. It’s about Russia.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Woody Allen

My wife is immature. Whenever I take a bath, she sinks my boats.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

I can't enjoy anything unless everybody is. If one guy is starving someplace, that puts a crimp in my evening.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

When we lose twenty pounds... we may be losing the twenty best pounds we have! We may be losing the pounds that contain our genius, our humanity, our love and honesty.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

There are drawbacks in being famous too, but you can live with those. They're not life-threatening. If the paparazzi are outside your restaurant or your house - and actors make such a big thing of it and scurry into cars and drape things - you think they're going to be crucified or something. It's not a big deal. You can get used to that. It's not so terrible.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

These were always obsessions of mine, even as a very young child. These were things that interested me as the years went on. My friends were more preoccupied with social issues - issues such as abortion, racial discrimination, and Communism - and those issues just never caught my interest. Of course they mattered to me as a citizen to some degree...but they never really caught my attention artistically.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

I'm so excited-I think today I'm going to brush all my teeth.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

When you work from city to city or country to country, you work the same way; the working method is the same.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

In 1940 I was just turning 5 years old and being taken to the movies. For those of us who were not old enough to understand the horror of war it was a very romantic era because these guys were kissing their wives and girlfriends goodbye and going off to fight and become heroes.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

I am not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happens.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Woody Allen

She had been critical of his new torch song, "A Side Order of Heartache, Please," suggesting it could be used as a good way to break in their new paper shredder.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

I don't want to be immortal through my works. I want to be immortal by not dying.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

There have been times when I've thought about it - but with my luck it would probably turn out to be only a temporary solution.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

A: Socrates is a man. B: All men are mortal. C: All men are Socrates.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

Throughout history in the theater and film people do like sarcastic characters, and they do like curmudgeons - if they're amusing, they do like them despite the fact that they're vitriolic, particularly if they're for the right thing. If you can see that the person is a decent person and is for the right thing, and is not just a nasty person with base motives, but someone who is a decent human but expresses himself.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Woody Allen

I was a smart kid and I was not understood by my parents.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

What is so fascinating about sitting around watching a bunch of pituitary cases stuff a ball through a hoop?

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

Human beings are divided into mind and body. The mind embraces all the nobler aspirations, like poetry and philosophy, but the body has all the fun.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

Chapter 1. He adored New York City. He idolized it all out of proportion...no, make that: he - he romanticized it all out of proportion. Yeah. To him, no matter what the season was, this was still a town that existed in black and white and pulsated to the great tunes of George Gershwin.' Uh, no let me start this over. 'Chapter 1. He was too romantic about Manhattan, as he was about everything else. He thrived on the hustle bustle of the crowds and the traffic. To him, New York meant beautiful women and street-smart guys who seemed to know all the angles...'. Ah, corny, too corny for my taste. Can we ... can we try and make it more profound? 'Chapter 1. He adored New York City. For him, it was a metaphor for the decay of contemporary culture. The same lack of individual integrity that caused so many people to take the easy way out was rapidly turning the town of his dreams in...' No, that's going to be too preachy. I mean, you know, let's face it, I want to sell some books here. 'Chapter 1. He adored New York City, although to him it was a metaphor for the decay of contemporary culture. How hard it was to exist in a society desensitized by drugs, loud music, television, crime, garbage...' Too angry, I don't want to be angry. 'Chapter 1. He was as tough and romantic as the city he loved. Behind his black-rimmed glasses was the coiled sexual power of a jungle cat.' I love this. 'New York was his town, and it always would be.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

Dying is like making love, except you don't get naseous afterwards.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Woody Allen

Taste my tuna casserole - tell me if I put in too much hot fudge.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Woody Allen

The chief problem about death, incidentally, is the fear that there may be no afterlife - a depressing thought, particularly for those who bothered to shave. Also, there is the fear that there is an afterlife but no one will know where it's being held. On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as easily laying down.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

I'm really a timid person - I was beaten up by Quakers

By Anonym 15 Sep

Woody Allen

There is something about big cities that turns me on, and for whatever mysterious reason, places like New York and Paris inspire me. I think it's because cities represent civilization, and as crime-ridden and broken down as some of them are, it's still better than skipping through a meadow.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Woody Allen

Sometimes the critics will like a film, and the public doesn't come. Sometimes the critics won't like the film, and the public will come. It's completely spontaneous. It's a hazard.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

Fantasy is seductive and much more wonderful than reality, but you can't take it to the bank. It's always an escape. And if used as an escape, as in attending a movie or a show for a circumscribed period of time, it's fine. When it starts to become undifferentiated from reality, it leads to big trouble.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Woody Allen

I work all the time because it's a great distraction and it keeps me from sitting home and obsessing morbidly.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Woody Allen

Since I was a kid, I could make up stories, I could make up funny jokes and I could always do it. When I'm walking down the street or having dinner, ideas will hit me, and I write them down on matchbooks or napkins and throw them in the draw.