Best 648 of Comedian quotes - MyQuotes

By Anonym 13 Sep

Fannie Flagg

Being a successful person is not necessarily defined by what you have achieved, but by what you have overcome.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Gary Gulman

I think of a lot of comedy being watched alone, for some reason. It's surprising to me that people are getting together to watch stand-up comedy.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Arj Barker

I never thought I'd be a comedian. But, growing up, I simply loved watching comedy. The '80s was huge for comedy in the US. Eddie Murphy blew me away with his film Delirious.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Joan Rivers

I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without plastic surgery.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Lil Boosie

I could be a comedian. I could be a gangster. I could play all of those parts, even for the first time... I'm versatile.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Woody Allen

I'm a comedian. I make comic films and there are certain ideas that occur to me that are comic, with heavy, serious undertones. There are some ideas that are more frivolous to me. The next idea that could occur to me could be comedy about death and famine or something.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Denis Leary

I'm not saying being a comedian is brain surgery, but it is definitely - it's like being a carpenter. You learn how to make tables and chairs. You have to have the right tools, and you have to know how to put the thing together, right?

By Anonym 15 Sep

Elayne Boosler

There are many comedians who are afraid to work outside the coasts and the casinos because they're afraid they'll bomb.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Flip Wilson

Being a comedian is like being a con man. You have to make 'em like you before you can fool 'em.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Rob Riggle

When I approach villains, unless it's a drama, I'm a comedian, so I approach most things from a comedic point of view.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Jon Stewart

The real focus at first is to just become a good stand-up comedian, and then when you get to a certain level, then they allow you to do other things. You feel if you're overwhelmed by something or if you're not.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Ellen Degeneres

I'm a comedian, and I definitely see the humor in a lot of things. I am also sad a lot. I cry often and easily. I think you're supposed to feel all kinds of things.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Bob Newhart

Jack Benny was, without a doubt, the bravest comedian I have ever seen work. He wasn't afraid of silence. He would take as long as it took to tell the story.

By Anonym 15 Sep

B. J. Porter

There's so many variables in comedy. Comedy is not this thing that's a performance like a play. It's really an interaction with every single person in the room. And if there's a weirdness in the room for any people, be it something the comedians did at the top of the set or be it the mixture of the people isn't right, something can go awry. So it's really great to see you proven wrong about someone.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Chris Rock

Standup comedians are attracted to one another because of their faults. So we're all kind of messed up in the same way, and once I was around a group of people that saw the world in a different way, it's like this is where I need to be.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Josh Peck

Sometimes I don't want to go out and socialize; I just want to watch my favorite shows and comedians. But then I have to remember that it is important to participate in life if you want to portray real life on screen.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Al Franken

I know that it's probably not a good idea for a comedian, especially a satirist, to support a public policy group or a politician. This is something I learned only too well years ago when I did a fundraiser for Pol Pot. A few years later I saw 'The Killing Fields,' and I've got to tell you, I just felt like a schmuck.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Eddie Izzard

Comedy is like a very cokey, druggy sugar. You get hits of comedy, and it's very, "More, give me more of that stuff," because serotonin is being released in the brain. So it's basically, everyone becomes serotonin junkies, and we are serotonin dealers. And that's what being a comedian is about.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Jessie Cave

I am trying to work out what my taste is, comedy-wise. I look up to stand up comedians who appear to be telling the truth, but I don't mind if they are lying.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Paul Provenza

Some performers are brilliant comedians, some are genius musicians, and some just make you happy to be alive. THE BOBS are all of that - and then some.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Nick Thune

I don't know if people really care about my opinion on things or how I come up with things, and maybe that's an insecurity and why we're comedians in the first place, so I think with that you keep doing the material, you keep trying to be funny cause you think that's all you're wanted for.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Michael Bassey Johnson

As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life: ~people applaud you incessantly. ~love you more than their parents. ~give you a daily bread.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Taylor Momsen

I love comedy. If I could be a comedian - well, I probably would not take that job because it seems really hard, but I wish I could be.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Josh Mcdermitt

'The Walking Dead' was my favorite show before I even auditioned for it. That's every actor's dream, to be on a show that they're a fan of. It's just dark, and as a comedian, I'm drawn to dark things.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Gabriel Iglesias

That's one thing about my shows. I tell people, I'm not a comedian, I'm just a really funny reporter. I put my life out there and make it entertaining. By putting it out there, it helps me to deal with it, you know, so I don't snap and so I don't go off the handle when I get home.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Eliza Coupe

I was trained classically, and that's something that I want to do, but I do want to say that right now it's a good market for female comedians, and I want to explore that right now. I really do want to do dramas and meatier roles, especially film.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Louis C. K.

Comedians and Feminists... are natural enemies, because stereotypically-speaking, feminists can't take a joke and... comedians can't take criticism.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Kevin Pollak

I've loved the Internet space in terms of creative content control and ownership, the things I haven't had since I started as a stand-up comedian.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Dani Levy

I would have liked to be a comedian in the '20s, or maybe even a comedian on the Mayflower and have a statue somewhere.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Denise Duhamel

I also could see myself as a stand-up comedian, a fashion designer (for people of all sizes), a hairdresser, an earnest and eventually burnt-out politician, or the owner of a small bistro. But I fear that, without poetry, I would have simply been going through the motions.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Steve Martin

I like what a third man brings. A kind of oblique vision, seeing something in the material that you didn't know was there. As a comedian, I'm always listening to the audience. And in movies, sometimes the only audience you have is the producer and the director. I like having someone else's opinion, especially if you're on the same wavelength.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Jim Gaffigan

For stand-up comedians that go onstage and get to write and perform and direct, and do all these things, the allure of a television show is still there but if it doesn't offer a level of creative fulfillment, it's oddly unappealing.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Denis Leary

George Carlin was great right up to the end of his life. But Richard Pryor was probably the best, most gifted stand-up comedian who will ever live.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Dane Cook

You have to realize, when you're a comedian, that you have to have a thick skin. And trust me, being onstage in front of people is already difficult enough. Somebody's personal attack in an email is not as hard as getting onstage.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Al Franken

Well, a lot of politics is communicating with people, and obviously comedy has something to do with that. I've been a producer and led people. Also, being a comedian, you're under pressure.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Michael R. Burch

What do you call a comedian who runs for president? A trump card.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Marc Maron

I'm not for everyone. I'm barely for me.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Dana Gould

A good competition for comedians would be where a comedian has a conversation and is then quizzed on what the other person says.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Parker Posey

But it's fun to be something, have that, and you don't have to be real. It's like, comedians. They go on and they're doing all these jokes. I would be like that if I were more awake

By Anonym 14 Sep

Zero Mostel

The freedom of any society varies proportionately with the volume of its laughter.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Aziz Ansari

Being a rapper is about being cool, but being a comedian, you're not supposed to be the coolest guy.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Paul Rudd

I'm not a comedian. I didn't study sketch comedy; my background isn't that.

By Anonym 15 Sep

Brandon T. Jackson

What's the good thing about being an actor, you can do more things. Not just being a comedian, not going overboard but expressing myself within the confines of a film.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Cedric The Entertainer

I want to be a little more dramatic nowadays. I definitely want something big and funny, but I look for things that can just have people see me in a different light and let me mature as both an entertainer and an actor and a comedian.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Patton Oswalt

In my mind, I was always a comedian who was going to branch into writing.

By Anonym 13 Sep

John Cleese

Although I had good hand-eye coordination, I was so tall and skinny and muscularly weak that I just was not well coordinated. But what I started to do quite early on was watch some of the great old silent comedians, like Laurel and Hardy and Chaplin, and then later on Harold Lloyd and Buster Keaton.

By Anonym 14 Sep

Dick Cavett

Obviously those who burn to be professional jesters mean that they want to be successful comedians. And those are always an elite, microscopic portion of the population. But oh, how they try.

By Anonym 13 Sep

William Shatner

I'm a performer, comedian, entertainer, writer and director.

By Anonym 14 Sep

George Burns

Someone who makes you laugh is a comedian. Someone who makes you think and then laugh is a humorist.

By Anonym 13 Sep

Jack Benny

I believe in being honest with myself. If there's one thing I hate it's when a comedian is great and won't admit it. I've never met one like that, but if I did, I'd hate them.