Best 276 of Funny inspirational quotes - MyQuotes
It was not so very long ago that people thought that semiconductors were part-time orchestra leaders and microchips were very small snack foods.
According to the group People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, fish have feelings too. Whenever my sons go fishing they always tell me, "Dad it doesn't hurt a fish to get hooked." Well I watch and I see and I believe it's painful for the fish.
Should array indices start at 0 or 1? My compromise of 0.5 was rejected without, I thought, proper consideration.
If you are afraid of being lonely, don't try to be right.
Christian Nestell Bovee
A mother is the best friend God ever gave.
John Desmond Bernal
The full area of ignorance is not mapped. We are at present only exploring the fringes.
The great thing about taking big chances when you're younger is you have less to lose, and you don't know as much. So you take big swings.
Truth is what stands the test of experience.
All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.
So, if you feel a smile begin, don't leave it undetected, let's start an epidemic quick, and get the world infected!
The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead.
The more pity, that fools may not speak wisely what wise men do foolishly.
Never follow anyone else's path, unless you're in the woods and you're lost.
Concerning the difference between man and the jackass: some observers hold that there isn't any. But this wrongs the jackass.
It's not whether you win or lose - but whether I win or lose.
Interviewing is tough, especially if you don't know what you're looking for.
Happiness does not come from doing easy work but from the afterglow of satisfaction that comes after the achievement of a difficult task that demanded our best.
Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.
When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
Someone from Manolo Blahnik went into my shop and said: 'These shoes are not vegetarian.' That's the highest compliment, because you just can't tell that they are, and they are. My mum taught me to have a soul.
You're at your best when you don't know what you're doing.
Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.
When someone says, "I want a programming language in which I need only say what I want done," give him a lollipop.
Stop worrying, nobody gets out of this world alive.
Karen Marie Moning
Even I don't know what you're doing, and I know everything.
If you don't have wrinkles, you haven't laughed enough.
I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.
Dick Van Dyke
Women will never be as successful as men because they have no wives to advise them.
A sense of humor is the ability to understand a joke-and that the joke is oneself.
Readers are plentiful; thinkers are rare.
Everyone has a doctor in him or her; we just have to help it in its work. The natural healing force within each one of us is the greatest force in getting well. Our food should be our medicine. Our medicine should be our food. But to eat when you are sick, is to feed your sickness.
Natural forces within us are the true healers of disease.
The history of the world is the history of a few men who had faith in themselves
Computers are good at following instructions, but not at reading your mind.
I sometimes think, would I drink the milk from the breast of a woman I don't know? No. So I think, why would I drink it from a cow?
I guess good things come to those who wait.
I don't have false teeth. Do you think I'd buy teeth like these?
All things come to those who wait.
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other 999 follow women.
While I was drying off Maddie after her bath tonight, she said, 'I love you' to me for the first time. It sounded like 'All lub boo,' but I didn't care. To reciprocate, I showed her what an ex-Marine looks like when he cries.
Among the most striking things that I have learned is how much we have in common. I've sat down with people everywhere, discussing what was in their hearts and on their minds. And it doesn't take long to find commonality, which is often overlooked, ignored, dismissed, and rejected otherwise.
It is the ability to take a joke, not make one, that proves you have a sense of humor.
I've been vegan for about 10 and a half years. It's been all good. I'm obviously much healthier
When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened
I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch.
Teenage girls, please don’t worry about being super popular in high school, or being the best actress in high school, or the best athlete. Not only do people not care about any of that the second you graduate, but when you get older, if you reference your successes in high school too much, it actually makes you look kind of pitiful, like some babbling old Tennessee Williams character with nothing else going on in her current life. What I’ve noticed is that almost no one who was a big star in high school is also big star later in life. For us overlooked kids, it’s so wonderfully fair.
Nobody's a natural. You work hard to get good and then work to get better. It's hard to stay on top.
He has a heart of gold - only harder.
To do nothing is sometimes a good remedy.
Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most fools do.