Best 509 of Ironic quotes - MyQuotes
You don't have to grow horns to fight, but you should definitely grow some armor. - The Malwatch
T Bone Burnett
It's also ironic that in the old days of tape and tape hiss and vinyl records and surface noise, we were always trying to get records louder and louder to overcome that.
A foul feeling will wrinkle my nose as fast as a good one will have me sniffing around to find more. - The Malwatch
Some people have no humor, because they know every joke at another's expense is born from a truth that causes pain. - The Malwatch
Anger motivates as well as any other emotion in the short term. It's in longer doses that it's more poisonous than the others and will slowly eat away at you from the inside out. - The Malwatch
Don't waste your limited lifespan flying only when and where others tell you to. Instead, fly only at your own dreams' beckoning. - The Malwatch
I guess it's ironic. I just did the Gucci cologne ad, and I was the cologne thief in junior high.
When I burn too hot, I like to bask on icy glaciers to cool off. - The Malwatch
It's impossible to tell what a dream will morph in to until you're experiencing it. - The Malwatch
I don't have horse feathers, but I've got dragon feathers. Is that good enough nonsense for you? - The Malwatch
I love Derrick Brown for the surprise of one word waking up next to another. One moment tender, funny or romantic, the next, visceral, ironic and relevatory-here is the full chaos of life. An amazing talent.
A woman is like a river, the shallower, the more men she is capable of drowning.
Rock is ironic in that, up to a certain point, you can get better and better at it if you don't mind possibly looking more and more ridiculous.
A dreammaker can't help but turn all of their experiences into dreams. It preserves their memories beyond their existence. - The Malwatch
They would sweep their poverty under the carpet if only they had one.
She has been dreading tomorrow ever since it happened the first time.
A small tear in a wing membrane will become a gaping hole when it catches the wind as you try to fly. Take care of it before that happens. - The Malwatch
Franklin P. Adams
Nobody can write such ironic things unless he has a deep sense of injustice-injustice to those members of the race who are victims of the stupid, the pretentious and the hypocritical.
Springy feet make for easy running and soft landings. - The Malwatch
Shouldn't someone give a pep talk or something?' Minho asked... "Go ahead," Newt replied. Minho nodded and faced the crowd. 'Be careful,' he said dryly. 'Don't die.' Thomas would have laughed if he could, but he was too scared for it to come out. 'Great. We're all bloody inspired,' Newt answered.
You know? Ain’t it ironic how we live our entire lives without the luxury of time, only to spend an eternity in death.
All possible dreams exist, the normal, the abnormal, the unimaginable. Without action, they have no consequence, so why are some considered nightmares, and others fantasy? - The Malwatch
If you have a good idea, open your mouth and say something else.
I find it bitterly ironic that the bulk of the money a medical-malpractice jury awarded to Terri [Schaivo] for use in making her better instead went into Mr. Felos's pocket to make her dead.
And with the Occupy Movement, it's really ironic how the police come as representatives and enforcers of the powers that be, even though the people in the Occupy Movement are really on their side - not in terms of their behavior, but in terms of their economic status, in terms of who the police are in society and how much they're paid, and if you boil it down to the economics of it, the police should be out there marching with the Occupy Movement.
You succeed only a fraction of the number of times you make an attempt at something. To increase your chances of success, you must increase your number of attempts, which means also increasing the number of your failures. - The Malwatch
Collect the unusual so you have things to ponder. - The Malwatch
With crippled wings, sometimes you have to fall to fly. - The Malwatch
I don't create my dreams. I merely preserve the wanderings of my mind so I can explore them again later and share them with others. - The Malwatch
Good. I'm starving.
After torturing our adrenaline by watching a horror movie for a couple of hours the places we are most afraid of are the doors and windows of the room even though they are the only ways for us to escape in case of occurrence such an event.
You're only old when your dreams become dull. - The Malwatch
If you're afraid to fly because you might fall, you'll never be able to chase the dreams among the clouds, and will be stuck running after earth bound pursuits. - The Malwatch
Don't think that if you run your legs to exhaustion you can just simply spread you wings and start flying to continue your journey. Your body is not that compartmentalized. Exhaust either your legs or your wings and you will have exhausted the energy needed for the other as well. - The Malwatch
It's ironic that the Bible belt is the killing belt - Texas, Florida, Alabama, Virginia, and so forth, Georgia. Chief executioners.
It’s ironic that as scientists that don’t believe in god, were the ones that are closest to god.
Fly without direction. As long as you know where you want to go, you'll get there eventually. And if you don't know where you want to go, maybe you'll find it while you're flying. - The Malwatch
Words mean nothing, if you don't do something to give them meaning. - The Malwatch
It's ironic that retailers and restaurants live or die on customer service, yet their employees have some of the lowest pay and worst benefits of any industry. That's one reason so many retail experiences are mediocre for the public.
My first concert isn't that cool or ironic. I wish it had been like, "My first concert was the Backstreet Boys," but the first concert I went to, I think, was this band called The Samples.
It's hard and dangerous to fly when it's storming, but storms don't last forever. Do what you have to to stay safe until the storm passes and then be ready to spread your wings and fly when the skies are clear again. - The Malwatch
Your advice seems a little ironical." "Oh, you may either follow it or reverse it—that is its chief beauty. It is equally good taken either way.
I don't use big words to show off because it's ostentatious.
Do not mistake your dreams for understanding. Dreams are limited by the knowledge and perspective of their creator. - The Malwatch
For an adult, eating alone at McDonald's is admitting a kind of defeat.
I've never written a quote I feel would be suitable for my gravestone. Wouldn't it be ironic if it were this one? Oh, and could you pull a few weeds while you're here?
Have you ever tried wind dancing? - The Malwatch
If anger is burning you up, turn yourself into a phoenix and use it to fly, but make sure you turn back before it consumes your life and you die in ashes to be reborn in hatred. - The Malwatch
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I can heal from that. Words can kill, when they break your will, and words you can't take back. - The Malwatch
He was still furious at Quinn, but they were—literally—all in the same boat now.