Best 28 quotes of Stephan Pastis on MyQuotes

Stephan Pastis

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    Stephan Pastis

    A stand-up comedian faces the audiences and gets their immediate feedback. I hide behind the comic strip, and unless people write to me, I dont know what they think.

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    Stephan Pastis

    Basically, I learned to read by reading 'Peanuts,' just wanting to know what they were saying.

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    Stephan Pastis

    Brits have a better sense of humor in most ways. It's darker, more cutting.

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    Stephan Pastis

    I don't like drawing characters facing right. If I tried to do that at a book signing, I'd have to pencil it first.

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    Stephan Pastis

    If you put me in South Park, that audience is going to fall asleep in five minutes.

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    Stephan Pastis

    If you're from a certain generation, you basically learn to read with 'Peanuts.' It's sort of the template for the modern strip. Its influence ceased to be noticed because it's in everything.

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    Stephan Pastis

    I'm very harsh on real estate agents. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because of how the call every small house 'charming' and every run-down house a 'great fixer-upper'. Just once, I'd like them to show me a house and declare, 'This one's a piece of crap'.

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    Stephan Pastis

    I recently forced myself to read a book on quantum physics, just to try and learn something new. I was confused by the middle of the first sentence and it all went downhill from there. The only thing I can remember learning is that a parallel universe can theoretically be contained on the head of a needle. I don't really know what that means, but I am now more careful handling needles.

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    Stephan Pastis

    I seem to be able to get away with pun strips if I add a panel at the end where I somehow indicate that I know it's a bad pun.

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    Stephan Pastis

    It's best to love your family as you would a Siberian tiger-from a distance, preferably separated by bars.

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    Stephan Pastis

    I was a lawyer for 10 years, and when youre in law, things really have to get done, or somebody sues you. Its a great trick.

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    Stephan Pastis

    Most poetry just confounds me. I really want to like it, but I can't help thinking it's a hoax. (p. 24)

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    Stephan Pastis

    My wife Staci made me go to a wedding last weekend...If it weren’t for her, I’d be happy.

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    Stephan Pastis

    Repeats are the absolute soul-crushing killers of the comics page.

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    Stephan Pastis

    Sticking to my schedule, Ive gotten over seven months ahead, which allowed me to write a Pearls Before Swine movie script for the big screen.

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    Stephan Pastis

    The phrase 'I just turn on my monkey and it makes me feel good' sounds very dirty, but I can't explain why. It's great to try to use expressions like that on the comics page. People want to complain but they can't, because they can't figure out quite what they should be complaining about.

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    Stephan Pastis

    The writing is done on the computer, and the drawing is done by hand. I write, write, write, then I hit the illustration.

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    Stephan Pastis

    We need more cartoonists to truly retire when they retire, and not run repeats.

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    Stephan Pastis

    Whenever I see people with their collars up, I'm tempted to point it out to them like you would for someone who has a food stain on their shirt or food in their teeth, as if to say, 'Your fashion sense is so offensive I'm assuming it's some sort of accident you'll want to fix.

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    Stephan Pastis

    When I was at the University of California at Berkeley, I went to some classes that must have had more than four hundred students in them. I almost always sat in the far back of the auditorium so I could read the newspaper. I remember that I stayed late one day to ask the professor a question, and when I got up to him, all I could think to myself was, 'So this is what the professor looks like.

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    Stephan Pastis

    When you can't draw chameleons and you can't draw blenders, it's a bad idea to write strips where chameleons become blenders.

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    Stephan Pastis

    You can write a little and can draw a little, but there's necessarily a limitation on both in a comic strip, since it appears in such a tiny space.

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    Stephan Pastis

    Eternal condemnation is the key to selling doorknobs.

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    Stephan Pastis

    Having a syndicated comic strip is a great platform for ripping on expressions you hate.

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    Stephan Pastis

    I like to make fun of Jeffy [of Family Circus] the most, because I know the grown-up Jeff Keane personally and enjoy ridiculing him.

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    Stephan Pastis

    One funny image can sometimes save an otherwise mediocre strip. At least that's what I tell myself so I don't feel quite as crappy when I've just wasted four hours drawing and coloring a Sunday strip.

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    Stephan Pastis

    On the list of things I cannot draw, wedding dresses are right there next to cars.

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    Stephan Pastis

    When in doubt, give a character big, blown-up eyes and puffy lips.