Best 3947 quotes in «dog quotes» category

If you make a fool of yourself in front of a cat, he will sneer at you, if you are sober; he will leave the room if you are drunk. If you make a fool of yourself in front a dog, he will make a fool of himself, too.

If you love to read, if you love nature and if you have a dog, you've got it made.

If you order a milkshake at a diner and they mix dog poop into it, you probably wouldn't drink it. If you go into a town with pollution, you may survive and have a good visit, but you risk being poisoned.

If your day is full of little mean, dark thoughts, is it any wonder you feel crabby? Maybe it's because you let your mind run wild like a dog putting its nose into garbage everywhere.

If your dog should be dead, I'm gonna love you instead.

If youre a vegan who ran a marathon & got your dogs from a shelter, how do you decide which thing to wedge into the conversation first?

If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They're trained for that!

If you're cooking and not making mistakes, you're not playing outside your safety zone. I don't expect it all to be good. I have fat dogs because I scrap that stuff out the back door.

If you're interested in matching your mind with the most intelligent kind of beast I have ever encountered, get yourself a Scotty dog. He'll get bored very fast, and it will require all of your personal power and intelligence to keep up with him. You might find a good friend.

If you're in Journalism and you're looking for friends, you should get a dog.

If you're going to love animals and have a life with them, the odds are you're going to lose them. It's helpful when you get a dog to accept the fact that this dog is not going to be with you your whole life.

If you're Noah, and your ark is about to sink, look for the elephants first, because you can throw over a bunch of cats, dogs, squirrels, and everything else that is just a small animal and your ark will keep sinking. But if you can find one elephant to get overboard, you're in much better shape.

If you're the only hot dog stand in town, you're hot dogs don't have to be good.

If you run across a dog driving, would you ever forget that? You could never forget that, that bump. It'll haunt you for the rest of your life. Imagine if you killed a human being. You're not going to forget that. Well, I killed many.

If your words do not have a smile, if you do not talk heart to heart, and you decide everything with your head, it is better to keep a dog as a friend rather than you.

If you take away all the prairie dogs, there will be no one to cry for the rain.

If you take psychedelics and the Internet and music and put all of that together you have the basis for a new community that is wider and deeper than you know. The people who are building the new machines, who are designing the new circuitry, who are writing the new code are ALL freaks. They work for capitalist dogs, of course, because we all do, but the creative thrust of these technologies is being driven by people just like you and me.

If you the owner of the dog, really showing not just food but real affection, then dog very much appreciate. Isn't it?

If you treat a girl like a dog, she is going to piss on you.

If you treat your feelings with as much love as you treat your dog or your cat or your child you'll feel as if you were living in heaven.

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth.

If you want sex, have an affair. If you want a relationship, buy a dog.

If you want a long-term relationship that doesn't require a lot of work, I say, get a dog. They love you no matter what. But when it comes to humans, there's no secret; you really have to appreciate the person every single day.

If you want to hurt me, fine. Take my books. Burn down my house. Shave my head while I am sleeping. But nobody, nobody screws with my dog.

If you want to have a good life, you should focus on your family, on your business, on your dog, on your fun, and you'll have a good life.

If you want to imagine the future, imagine a boy and his dog and his friends. And a summer that never ends.

If you want to open a supermarket chain and put your face all around the globe, selling your baby and your dog, if it makes you happy, who am I to disagree, as the song goes. But it's not for me. I've always tried to keep my integrity and keep my autonomy.

If you were aboard a lifeboat with a baby and a dog, and the boat capsized, would you rescue the baby or the dog?" Regan, "If it were a retarded baby and a bright dog, I'd save the dog.

If you want to retire young and retire rich, it is very important that your money be like a bird dog, going out every day and bringing home more and more assets.

If you would wish the dog to follow you, feed him

I get a lot from great '90s artists like Juliana Hatfield, The Pixies, and bands like That Dog and The Breeders.

I get a lot of sleep on the bus. I bring two dogs with me, who keep me grounded. I guess that's just in my soul. It's good to know that you're good at something.

I get ticked off a lot because I don't think she [Faith Hill] gets the respect she deserves. I tell her all the time, "If you were 300 pounds and dog ugly, people would think you were the greatest singer in the world." They have the tendency to look at her and never really listen to her. The reason it works is she's a fantastic artist. It's almost embarrassing for me to sing with her sometimes.

I get in my golf cart with my dogs, I have five dogs.

I get to sit at home with the dogs on the sofa, record in a closet in the office, send them off and, if I'm lucky, make a million dollars.

I get stoned, I can't get home, I'm calling long distance on a public saxophone. My head is achin', my back is breakin', feel I got run over by Captain Coconut and his dog named Rover.

I glanced up to see Liz and smiled. "Thank you." "I just went along for the ride. After that happened-" She waved at Derek. "You know how blind people need Seeing Eye dogs? Well, apparently werewolves could really use Opening Door poltergeists.

I get up around 7 a.m. That's very early for a stand-up comic. Then I'll have breakfast with my husband, the artist Al Ridenour, take my three dogs for a walk and commence with my work.

'Iggy' was my dog - he was named after Iggy Pop - and 'Azalea' is the street where I grew up; together, they have the right amount of syllables to make the perfect name.

I got a dog-training book. It says Grendel needs mental stimulation, so I tried to train him, but I think he must be retarded.

I got a new dog. He's a paranoid retriever. He brings back everything because he's not sure what I threw him.

I go out to the kitchen to feed the dog, but that's about as much cooking as I do.

I got a dog and named him 'Stay'. Now, I go 'Come here, Stay!' After a while, the dog went insane and wouldn't move at all.

I got my dog back, in African-American language, your dog means your passion, your fire.

I got a dog with a Napoleon complex. I have a Napoleon complex. We're small. Anything big that we feel is threatening us, we want to fight. We're not a pushover.

I got a pit bull from a shelter, so my whole life is centered on this dog, and I've been writing a lot of dog jokes. I should probably give up now, because I'm writing jokes about my dog.

I got my dog three years ago because I was drunk in a pet store. We had nine cats at the time. The cats started hiding the alcohol after that.

I grew up in a house with dogs. We always had dogs. We always had a bunch of dogs, actually.

I grew up around animals [seven horses, dogs and now a pet goldfish named Leila] and I'm rebelling against them not having a natural existence.

I grew, a happy, healthy child in a bright world of illustrated books, clean sand, orange trees, friendly dogs, sea vistas and smiling faces.