Best 19 quotes in «funny valentines day quotes» category

Give me a thousand kisses, then a hundred, then a thousand more.

It goes Christmas, New Year's Eve, Valentine's Day. Is that fair to anyone who's alone? These are all days you gotta be with someone. And if you didn't get around to killing yourself at Christmas or New Year's, boom! There's Valentine's Day. I think there should be one more after Valentine's Day just called, 'Who could love you?'

One advantage of marriage is that, when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again.

Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.

Oh here's an idea: let's make pictures of our internal organs and give them to other people we love on Valentine's Day. That's not weird at all.

Love is just a chocolate substitute.

Men have died from time to time, and worms have eaten them, but not for love.

My heart's in the right place. I know, 'cuz I hid it there.

No matter how lovesick a woman is, she shouldn't take the first pill that comes along!

Our first and last love is self-love.

Some emotions don't make a lot of noise. It's hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint - like a heartbeat. And pure love - why, some days it's so quiet, you don't even know it's there.

Romance is dead - it was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney, homogenized, and sold off piece by piece.

Sex, unlike justice, should not be seen to be done.

The jewelry stores say, 'Tell your wife you love her with a diamond,' while wives tell you they love you with, 'Ok, but just because it's Valentine's Day.'

The bravest thing that men do is love women.

Today, folks, should be all about love. Unless you're old.

A bride at her second marriage does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.

Valentine's Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone, you're alone.

By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.