Best 1015 quotes in «beer quotes» category

I don't think I've actually drunk a beer for 15 years, except a few Guinnesses in Dublin, where it's the law.

I don't think I've ever stepped into a gym - they won't let me smoke there. I just thank God Miller Lite isn't as fattening as most beers. If I cut back on beer, though, I'd look anorexic.

I don't understand why a 40 is a quarter of beer when a 40 is 40 ounces. It's time to embrace the metric system.

I don't want to sound superficial, but when I go see a movie myself, I'd rather look at Tom Cruise than some shmo with a beer belly

I drink a few beers, and I've smoked a little pot. But I'm too health conscious to do it regularly. I run a lot. I don't smoke cigarettes. Pot is the hardest thing I've tried, really.

I drink a lot of beer, and that's the drug of choice. You find the drug that works for you. I know, for instance, this guy named Harlan Ellison - and he's not alone - who's very proud of the fact that he doesn't put dope into his body. He tries not to put additives into his body, or anything like that. But he can afford to do that because Harlan's drug of choice is Harlan.

I drink a lot of everything; beer while watching football. I have a taste for whiskey, but Jack Daniels and ginger is about as fancy as it gets with me.

I drink alone. Yeah, with nobody else. You know when I drink alone, I prefer to be by myself.

I drink no cider, but feast on Philadelphia beer.

I drink when I have occasion, and sometimes when I have no occasion.

I drink to make other people interesting.

I enjoy tasting [beer]. But I'm not a drinker, period. With my schedule, I don't really have time.

I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on.

If all else fails immortality can always be assured by adequate error.

If a man ordered a beer milk shake, he thought, he'd better do it in a town where he wasn't known.

If an idea's worth having once, it's worth having twice.

If a tax on malt would raise the price of beer, a tax on bread must raise the price of bread.

If beer got any lighter you could raise goldfish in it.

I fear the man who drinks water and so remembers this morning what the rest of us said last night

I feel sorry for people who do not have a Bible to lean on.

If I had to think of what I would do different in my whole career, it's that I never would have picked up a beer, bottle of vodka. That definitely changed my life. That is an Achilles' heel for me.

If George W. Bush is the kind of person folks might like to have a beer with, John McCain is the guy you pray you don't get seated next to at a dinner party.

If I saved all the money I spent on beer, I'd spend it on beer.

If in 1989 I said, 'I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,' they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.

If I'm having a fancy glass of champagne, I'll always mix it with the champagne of beers. Because I deserve all the champagnes.

I find the only thing that really stands up, better than gambling, better than booze, better than women, is reading.

If Merkel has discovered Europe in a beer tent, I can only say: better late than never. Otherwise, it was the height of hypocrisy: The chancellor sat down for a beer with CSU Chairman Horst Seehofer, the man who after the election praised Donald Trump as a very resolute man.

If only Ed Fleming had a mother who gave such sound advice. The manager of Wazoo's, a downtown Denver restaurant, Fleming is a CSU alum who has been darned giddy about the Rams' recent success. So giddy that he donned a necklace made of Pez candies, a red blazer - and nothing else. A few people gaped (some actually set aside their beers), but most ignored Fleming as he strutted like a red-blazered rooster, demanding that all hail the Mighty Naked Beer King.

If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing; and from robbing he comes next to drinking and Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination.

I found it." "People find pennies," Gansey replied. "Or car keys. Or four-leaf clovers." "And ravens," Ronan said. "You're just jealous 'cause" - at this point, he had to stop to regroup his beer-sluggish thoughts - "you didn't find one, too.

I found that a couple of bottles of beer would give me a lift, but the third bottle would sober me up.

I found myself back in the sepulchral city resenting the sight of people hurrying through the streets to filch a little money from each other, to devour their infamous cookery, to gulp their unwholesome beer, to dream their insignificant and silly dreams. They trespassed upon my thoughts.

If somebody attacks me with words, I'm always like, Do you know me? Do you know me that well? Let's have a beer and talk about it.

If she drinks beer, she's a keeper.

If someone from Germany or somewhere, who had no idea what baseball was, saw Kruk play, he'd wonder what the beer truck driver was doing playing first base.

If the price of the drug people want to use is through the roof, well then they're going to have to commit crimes to get the money to get the drug. You don't see any crimes committed over a pack of cigarettes or a bottle of beer, do you?

If the headache would only precede the intoxication, alcoholism would be a virtue.

If they had built the Energy East pipeline to transport beer, we'd be okay.

If you can drink beer while doing it, it's not a sport

If you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm. Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants to see us happy.

If you don't know what else to do, drink beer.

If you drink like a fish, don't drive: swim.

If you faced a long hungry period with nothing between you and starvation but a bit of barley and a pig, you'd be better off turning the barley into beer and letting the pig starve.

If you rise in life, you have to behave in a certain way. You can go to a strip club if you're a beer-swilling sand shoveler, but if you're the Bishop of Boston, you shouldn't go.

If you guys are going to be throwing beer bottles at us, at least make sure they're full.

If you're sad and you like beer, I'm your lady, ... The Saddest Music in the World.

I have always loved marijuana. It has been a source of joy and comfort to me for many years. And I still think of it as a basic staple of life, along with beer and ice and grapefruits - and millions of Americans agree with me.

If you want someone to grab a beer with, I may not be that guy. But if you want someone to drive you home, I will get the job done and I will get you home.

If you want to see Chris Jericho drink a beer with Stone Cold Steve Austin, give me a doo-a dee-dee-dam, dee-dee-doo.

I had dropped a good design, which I had once bent my thoughts upon, and that was to try if I could not make some of my barley into malt, and then try to brew myself some beer.