Best 140 quotes of Kin Hubbard on MyQuotes

A bad cold wouldn't be so annoying if it weren't for the advice of our friends.

A bee is never as busy as it seems; it's just that it can't buzz any slower.

About the only thing we have left that actually discriminates in favor of the plain people is the stork.

A fellow ought to save a few of the long evenings he spends with his girl till after they're married.

After a fellow gets famous it doesn't take long for someone to bob up that used to sit by him in school.

A good listener is usually thinking about something else.

A grouch escapes so many little annoyances that it almost pays to be one.

All I kin git out o' the Wickersham position on prohibition is that the distinguished jurist seems to feel that if we'd let 'em have it the problem o' keepin' 'em from gitten;' it would be greatly simplified

All the world loves a good loser.

A loafer always has the correct time.

A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen.

A never-failing way to get rid of a fellow is to tell him something for his own good.

An optimist is a fellow who believes what's going to be will be postponed

Another bad thing about "prosperity" is that you can't jingle any money without being under suspicion

A sadder but wiser man is a thousand times more agreeable to meet than the feller that never makes a mistake.

As to those who hoard gold and silver and spend it not in God's path, give them, then, the tidings of a painful agony: on a day when these things shall be heated in hell-fire, and their foreheads, and their sides, and their backs shall be branded therewith.

A sympathizer is a fellow that's for you as long as it doesn't cost anything.

Bargain... anything a customer thinks a store is losing money on.

Beauty is . . . a valuable asset if you're poor or haven't any sense.

Bees are not as busy as we think they are. They just can't buzz any slower.

Being an optimist after you've got everything you want doesn't count.

Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.

Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune.

Don't a fellow feel good after he gets out of a store where he nearly bought something.

Don't knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while.

Don't say yes until I've finished talking. - Attributed to many Hollywood executives Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny.

Every father expects his boy to do the things he wouldn't do when he was young.

Every once in a while someone without a single bad habit gets caught.

Everything comes to him who waits, except a loaned book.

Executive: a man who makes quick decisions and is sometimes right.

Experience is a dear teacher but he delivers th' goods.

Fashion: a barricade behind which men hide their nothingness.

Flattery won't hurt you if you don't swallow it.

Folks that blurt out just what they think wouldn't be so bad if they thought.

Fun is like life insurance; the older you get, the more it costs.

Gittin' talked about is one o' th' penalties for bein' purty.

Gittin' talked about is one o' th' penalties for bein' purty, while bein' above suspicion is about th' only compensation fer bein' homely.

Gossip is vice enjoyed vicariously - the sweet, subtle satisfaction without the risk.

Hon Editor Cale Fluhart was a power politically fer years, but he never got prominent enough t' have his speeches garbled.

Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people.

I don't look for much to come out of government ownership as long as we have Democrats and Republicans.

If capital and labor ever do get together it's good night for the rest of us.

If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on a vacation.

If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy.

If there's any literary ability in a feller, getting fired out of a good government job will bring it out.

If there's anything a public servant hates to do it's something for the public.

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest.

I'm sorry to inform you that your 50 year warranty has expired on your back, knees, and memory. Luckily your lifetime warranty on your heart is still in effect. Of course, that becomes void and expires when you do.

I never saw an athletic girl that thought she was strong enough to do indoor work.

In order to live off a garden, you practically have to live in it.