Best 411 quotes in «ass quotes» category

A man sufficiently gifted with humor is in small danger of succumbing to flattering delusions about himself, because he cannot help perceiving what a pompous ass he would become if he did.

An ass is beautiful to an ass, and a pig is beautiful to a pig.

And I'm a pair of pants with a hole scorched through the ass?

Anyone can see that an ass laden with books remains a donkey. A human being laden with the undigested results of a tussle with thoughts and books, however, still passes for wise.

A person whodoes not regard music as a marvelous creation of God, must be a clodhopper indeed and does not deserve to be called a human being; he should be permitted to hear nothing but the braying of asses and the grunting of hogs.

A pat on the back is six inches away from a kick up the ass.

As for my own truncated secondary education, my head was in the clouds as my mom would say, or if you asked my father, up my ass.

Apuleius married a rich widow, then wrote _The Golden Ass_.

As far as guitar goes, it's weird to have such a challenging activity in my life for so long - I love it. It kicks my ass every day.

As I grow older, I put all life's bulls**t aside. I think the process of the laying off of the bulls**t starts around 40. Before that, most men have their heads stuck in their ass. After 40, you see things differently. You've found yourself. You're accepting yourself and what you got from life.

Art is a finger up the bourgeoisie ass.

As an artist, that's our job - to be with you in times of celebration and when the world is kicking your ass.

Ask your doctor if getting off your ass is right for you

Bad as I wanna be. She aint bad, she a sad little wannabe.

ASS, n. A public singer with a good voice but no ear.

A stubborn ass needs a stubborn driver

At a certain age, you have to choose between your face and your ass.

A synopsis of every story we do: someone gets over their own stupid ass.

A vile beastly rottenheaded foolbegotten brazenthroated pernicous piggish screaming, tearing, roaring, perplexing, splitmecrackle crashmecriggle insane ass of a woman is practising howling below-stairs with a brute of a singingmaster so horribly, that my head is nearly off.

Basically, that's why I wrote: to save my ass, to save my ass from the madhouse, from the streets, from myself.

Bite your teeth into the ass of life.

Be loud, be pretty and keep their black-hatin' asses in their chairs

Be proud of who you are.

Being on "SNL" was a goal that I had when I was younger. When I got fired, I just felt really mad and I felt really grossed out by the system and grossed out by myself and it just sort of knocked me on my ass.

Bend over to the front touch toes Back dat ass up and down and get low (get low)

Can an ass be tragic?--To perish under a burden that one can neither bear nor cast off? The case of the philosopher.

Boys don't make passes at female smart asses.

Burn the Louvre, and wipe your ass with the Mona Lisa. This way at least, God would know our names.

But my thoughts ran a wool-gathering; and I did like the countryman, who looked for his ass while he was mounted on his back.

By outward show let's not be cheated; An ass should like an ass be treated.

Don't be a jerk to other comics and don't let the business beat you down, stay positive and if you work your ass off you're going to get somewhere.

Change doesn't begin when we get knocked on our ass. It begins the moment we decide to get back up on our own feet

Childbirth is no more a miracle then eating food and a turd coming out of your ass.

Damn it all, you have been given a life on this beautiful planet! Get off your ass and do something!

Christ rode on an ass, but now asses ride on Christ.

Coach Bryant, before you start hugging me, you ought to know that my boys are fixing to get after y'all's ass.

Creative work, summarized: In the time you set aside each day to work your ass off, ignore anything that makes you consider stopping.

Cyclists are a pain in the ass.

Develop a built-in bullshit detector.

Donald Trump is attacking President Obama's background. And I said, 'Wait a minute, Trump also is from a mixed background. He's half jack and half ass.'

Don't blow smoke up my ass. You'll ruin my autopsy

Even a kick in the ass is good when you're facing the right direction.

Each nation knowing it has the only true religion and the only sane system of government, each despising all the others, each an ass and not suspecting it.

Do your homework and know your business better than anyone. Otherwise, someone who knows more and works harder will kick your ass.

Every bad decision I've made has been based on money. I grew up in the projects and you don't turn down money there. You take it, because you never know when it's all going to end. I made Cop III because they offered me $15 million. That $15 million was worth having Roger Ebert's thumb up my ass.

Every man who has declared that some other man is an ass or a scoundrel, gets angry when the other man conclusively shows that the assertion was erroneous.

Every time I sit down with him, I know why he is who he is, and that's really cool. It's a great feeling. It sucks because I'm so not an ass-kisser, but he's George Lucas.

Freud's fanciful pseudo-explanations (precisely because they are brilliant) perform a disservice. Now any ass has these pictures available to use in "explaining" symptoms of an illness.

F-ck you, p-ssy ass haters you should do you.

FEMA I always thought was a bone here in your ass.