Best 411 quotes in «ass quotes» category

If you never wished you were an ass, you are most probably an ass.

I'm the perfect girl. You read about me in Maxim or whatever. I tell dirty jokes like I'm one of the guys, and I'm sitting there in my panties and bra so you can see I'm a piece of ass in the bargain. Except I'm real, so I come with all kinds of complications.

Is no revenge of the nerds, you know what, last year when everything collapsed, all it meant was the nerds lost out once again and the jocks won. Same as always ... Some of the quants are smart, but quants come, quants go, they're just nerds for hire with a different fashion sense. The jocks may not know a stochastic crossover if it bites them on the ass, but they have that drive to thrive, they're synced in to them deep market rhythms, and that'll always beat out nerditude no matter how smart it gets.

Objectionable, tedious, irritating labour, - this is the condition of genius, which no doubt explains the reason why men so rarely achieve anything. Genius must submit to cultivate an ass within itself - the condition being so humiliating that man will seldom take up the job.

It struck me that my backside was my best asset and that keeping it hidden would be like Oedipus pulling out his eyes so that he couldn't see the errors of the past.

i recommend the phrase 'pineapple ass

I've found that busting your ass on a daily basis to make your art good, clear, and meaningful creates the most luck.

My heart can see the ass in you.

Someday, I’ll gain telepathic powers like every other regular movie ghost and I will go all Freddie Krueger on his bony, little, rat arse!” I rolled my eyes, but kept marching down the street. “Then I’d have to go all Ghostbusters on yours.”, I tried to keep my voice low to keep from drawing attention to myself. “No, you wouldn’t. You love my arse, darling!”, he walked backwards few feet in front of me. His big smile was enough to make me grin and roll my eyes again at him.

Sitting to think of what to write will only set your ass on fire, give you headache, twist your face to look stupid, instead, walk around with a blank mind and something from somewhere will fill it up.

Some men’s chests are more buttlike than some women’s butts.

There are four kinds of people to avoid in the world: the assholes, the asswipes, the ass-kissers, and those that just will shit all over you.

The average woman feels small whenever a man who has just walked past her does not turn his head to check out her ass, especially if it is—or if she feels that it is—big.

The ass is the face of the soul of sex.

The French do some things better, like spanking for instance.

There is an innate gratification in falling from grace. The supreme pleasure of love is illicit love, a feeling that you are doing wrong. Spanking girls and being a girl receiving a spanking captures that feeling, that beyond the pleasure enhanced by the pain is a sense that you are being just a little bit wicked.

When the world kicks your ass, don't step in line. book: stuff i think about

Three year in prison and a dick is just another thing to put up your ass.

Tiger resists. "WAIT. We're ALL friends HERE. What is it you wanna talk about? SEX? The new DILDO my mom bought me? Or the HAIR on my sister's ASS-

There is nothing to compare with that moment when you are bent over his knee and feel the material chaff against your bottom as he pulls your panties down. At that second, round cheeks revealed, plump and quivering, it is like jumping out of an airplane, pulling the ripcord and waiting for the parachute to open.

What the hell was that?” he asked no-one in particular. “Did they ram us?” “Uh – negative, sir.” Marnetti offered, reading an instrumental assessment from his display, “It seems we were hit by some kind of pulse wave generated by their jump.” “Their jump? – You mean by arriving they nearly killed us?” Marnetti nodded, continuing, “Range 0.5 kilometers, Captain. Holding steady. No recognized weapons activity.” “Damage report.” He ordered, feeling his way back into his seat, eyes glued to the viewscreen. “Shield 2 down, 1 is buckling.” Pluddeman choked. “Power stable, all systems holding steady,” Marnetti added, now rubbing some bruises. “Any communications?” “Nothing, sir. Static on all frequencies.” “What are they doing?” “Nothing, sir. Waiting maybe.” “Waiting, my ass!” Dayne barked. “They must be sizing us up!

When his hand came down across my bottom the first time I thought I was going to die. But the pain passed, transmuted as if my some alchemical wizardry, and for a moment I experienced a surreal satisfaction in being bent over in this way without rights or choices, past or future. In pain you are living in the present and as the pain passes there is pleasure from having endured the pain.

Would you like me to spank you?" he asked. He was very polite and I wasn't sure what to say. I shrugged and took a breath. "If you like," I replied. "There's a good girl. Now, come here, take your knickers down and bend over my knee." And that's what I did.

Who knows himself a braggart, let him fear this, for it will come to pass that every braggart shall be found an ass.

Wolfgang Amadé Mozart takes pity on Leutgeb, ass, ox, and simpleton, at Vienna, March 27, 1783.

Yes, the hermitage is underground--miles beneath the surface of Antarctica. And yes, Ike refers to it as unten--literally 'under' or 'below.' But, hello, it's 'hyperborean'--of or relating to the arctic, frigid, very cold. The opposite of infernally hot. Well, what if it's WAY underground down near the inner core of the earth, where it's like 10,000 degrees? Well, what if it's up your ass where it's like 10,000,000 degrees? Well, what if you're a cocksucking dwarf racist retard midget dickwad? Well, what if you're a fucking scatological-bakery urinal-cake-boss motherfucking fist-fucked cow-pie anal-fissureman motherfucker?

You said that you are smart, didn't you? 2112@1%, 2%1%2! 1(81%1@4 25 71@14 2)812) 2)85 6911(2) 1@52@51@ 2#11( 1(1% 511(2% So try to solve this, if you solve it... You are one smart ass!

You ain't born for this shit, get your ass together and make things happen for you.

You can't say asses in church unless you are speaking of donkeys.

A burro is an ass. A burrow is a hole in the ground. As a journalist you are expected to know the difference.

Achieving meaningful goals requires that you commit your entire ass, not just one cheek.

Accumulating injuries are the price we pay for the thrill of not having sat around on our asses.

Aficionado my ass...I just love to smoke cigars

A fire lit under my ass? Yeah, that's true. No time to waste.

A happy fart never comes from a miserable ass.

After all we'd been through, we still couldn't take our heads from out of our asses or our hands from around each other's throats.

After watching mulattas shake it, I can totally understand why Brazil is devoted to my favorite body part, the ass.

A good lead-off hitter is a pain in the ass to pitchers.

All women are NATURALLY, bad ass!

A lion may die of an ass's kick.

All my compatriots are asses compared to me.

All of us are subjected to somebody else's power at some point. So once in a while you kiss ass. So what? Either you make your peace with that early, or you end up living your life as a crank and a misfit.

All I want to do is sit on my ass and fart and think of Dante.

A lot of social media saved my ass, so I'm totally for it.

And I'm a pair of pants with a hole scorched through the ass?

A man searching for enlightenment is like a man sitting on an Ass in search of an Ass

A man that hoards up riches and enjoys them not, is like an ass that carries gold and eats thistles.

A man sufficiently gifted with humor is in small danger of succumbing to flattering delusions about himself, because he cannot help perceiving what a pompous ass he would become if he did.

An ass is beautiful to an ass, and a pig is beautiful to a pig.

Anyone can see that an ass laden with books remains a donkey. A human being laden with the undigested results of a tussle with thoughts and books, however, still passes for wise.