Best 571 quotes in «jokes quotes» category

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    I laugh and joke, but I don't get distracted very easily.

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    I like a President who tells jokes instead of appointing them.

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    I like the purity of stand-up because it is all about whether people laugh at your jokes. Either they laugh or they don't.

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    I like to create stuff. I like to express myself through jokes.

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    I like when people are trapped in the joke, when there's no escape. I like to lead people down the wrong path and then trap them.

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    I love inside jokes. I hope to be a part of one some day.

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    I love telling myself jokes. I think I'm a riot.

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    I'm a fun person. I like cracking jokes and being completely nerdy.

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    I love those people who do story-telling and who ramble on, but I don't do that, I tell jokes - the sort of jokes that anyone really could tell in the pub.

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    I make a joke that I'm the Internet curmudgeon, but 'wary' is a good way to put it.

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    I'm a joke comic. I tell jokes. I like writing a joke, and I like when a joke works, and I like other comics who tell jokes.

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    I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I am perfect!

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    I'm an environmentalist. Most of my jokes are recycled.

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    I'm a plethora of stolen jokes and kitschy references.

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    I'm banned from Middlebrook elementary for telling dirty jokes to the janitor. The janitor! He cleans up dirt for a living.

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    I'm not really very funny, I just keep recycling jokes.

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    I'm in nobody's circle, I've always been an outsider.

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    I'm not a joke guy; I'm not a stand-up comic.

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    I'm really bad with jokes. I would have to say Limp Bizkit.

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    I'm offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.

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    In polite society one laughs at all the jokes, including the ones one has heard before.

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    I'm used to explaining to people why my jokes were funny.

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    In Bengal, Hindus are known to crack jokes at the expense of their gods and goddesses and that's what I did.

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    In fact, it used to be a joke if you studied at a University

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    In my deepest parts of sadness, I'm always making a joke or being sarcastic.

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    In life there are always these things happening if you can just get the joke.

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    I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe's singing until somebody told me that it wasn't a joke.

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    I performed stand-up because I didn't have to ask anyone's permission. My set was never joke-centric. It was a performance.

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    I played the tour in 1967 and told jokes and nobody laughed. Then I won the Open the next year, told the same jokes, and everybody laughed like hell.

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    I suppose every time [something bad happens], I have that instinct to make that joke that distracts.

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    Is that a joke? Please tell me you're joking. -Sophie I never joke about carnivorous bunnies. -Luca

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    It doesn't feel like you're preaching, if you can say something in a joke.

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    It ain't no joke when you lose your vinyl.

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    It devastates me now that I have been reduced to a Hollywood statistic - another joke marriage.

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    I tell very mean jokes.

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    I tell the most horrible jokes.

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    I took my girl to dinner, and she laughed so hard at one of my jokes that she dropped her tray.

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    It is not a sin to be seventy but it is also no joke.

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    It got very tedious saying the same jokes in the same way with the same attitude.

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    I think things evolve into jokes. I don't generally write them down as jokes. I talk them out.

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    It's easy for someone to joke about scars if they've never been cut.

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    It’s a basic rule of humor that a joke is always at somebody’s expense. Really good jokes, however, tend to be at everyone’s expense.

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    It's perfectly okay if you don't understand every single one of them. For one thing, I make a lot of corny jokes, and you have to be 40 years old to get some of them.

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    It's mandatory in this day and age to be considered to have a sense of humor and to demonstrate it. You're not paying me for a joke, You're paying me for the right joke.

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    It's not appropriate to joke about the Ku Klux Klan.

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    It's much easier to make jokes about not having kids.

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    It's not a stereotype if it's always true.

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    It's really stupid to defend your own jokes. That is for other people to do if they choose to.

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    It was a joke, okay? If we thought it would actually be used, we wouldn't have written it!

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    It was almost funny. Life seemed downright accidental in its brevity, and death a punch line to a lousy joke.