Best 708 quotes in «sarcasm quotes» category

For some reason that only a sociologist might be able to accurately explain, the Brazilian Press was extremely unkind to me, reporting only selective derogatory untruthful rumors (some of which are still around), harsh criticism, and unwarranted sarcasm. I was very hurt by this. It was such great disappointment... When I came back from Brazil at that time, I made a promise to myself that I would never, ever again sing in Brazil. So far [as of 2002], I have kept this promise, having declined each and every invitation or proposals to perform in Brazil. Once was enough!

For your information, I would like to ask a question.

Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned.

Growing up and living in England, I'm surrounded by grey skies and sarcasm, so when I came to America, my first impressions were bright, hopeful, cheerful.

Having the critics praise you is like having the hangman say you've got a pretty neck.

He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.

He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.

He didn't see me looking at him, but I could tell the ceremony was having the same effect on him. He was enraptured. It was a rare and sweet look for him, reminding me of the tortured artist that lived beneath the sarcasm. I liked that about Adrian—not the tortured part, but the way he could feel so deeply and then transform those emotions into art.

His ignorance is encyclopedic.

Her virtue was that she said what she thought, her vice that what she thought didn't amount to much.

He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.

His neighbor is a tooth-drawer. That bag at his girdle is full of the teeth that he drew at Winchester fair. I warrant that there are more sound ones than sorry, for he is quick at his work and a trifle dim in the eye.

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.

History repeats itself. That's one of the things wrong with history.

History teaches us virtue, but nature never ceases to teachh us vice.

how does she know it's the right room?' wondered Descant. Oh, I don't know; mabye it's the magical red glow coming from the doorway, or perhaps it's the deafening howl of the temporal winds.' said Mervall. Descant nodded.'You could be right, brother. And don't think I don't know sarcasm when I hear it.

I always get the better when I argue alone.

I can do only one thing at a time, but I can avoid doing many things simultaneously.

I am in full possession of the amazing power of being sarcastic.

I can fluently speak five languages: English, emoji, sexting, sarcasm and sass.

I did a picture in England one winter and it was so cold I almost got married.

I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves.

I don't mind what language an opera is sung in so long as it is the language I don't understand.

I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting.

I'd to do more stuff with less sarcasm.

I do sarcasm really poorly.

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.

If the French were really intelligent, they'd speak English.

If you can find something everyone agrees on, it's wrong.

I find that the further I go back, the better things were, whether they happened or not.

If the world should blow itself up, the last audible voice would be that of an expert saying it can't be done.

If you're choking in a restaurant you can just say the magic words, 'Heimlich maneuver,' and all will be well. Trouble is, it's difficult to say 'Heimlich maneuver' when you're choking to death.

If you drink like a fish, don't drive: swim.

If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.

If you love someone set them free. If they come back, set them on fire.

I grew up in an environment of jokes and sarcasm and puns. I talk that way, so I write that way.

I have only one ambition left: I should like to have a good epitaph.

I have been complimented many times and they always embarrass me; I always feel that they have not said enough.

I have my own views about Nature's methods, though I feel that it is rather like a beetle giving his

I grew up in Europe, where the history comes from.

I have seen slower people than I am and more deliberate... and even quieter, and more listless, and lazier people than I am. But they were dead.

I just want you that's it. All your flaws, mistakes, smiles, giggles, jokes, sarcasm. Everything. I just want you

It's easier to replace a dead man than a good picture.

I love Americans, but not when they try to talk French. What a blessing it is that they never try to talk English.

In order to fully realize how bad a popular play can be, it is necessary to see it twice.

I see little hope for democracy as an effective form of government, but I admire the poetry of how it makes its victims complicit in their own destruction.

It ain't often that a man's reputation outlasts his money.

I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.

I think you want a little unofficial help. Three undetected murders in one year won't do, Lestrade. But you handled the Molesey Mystery with less than your usual - that's to say, you handled it fairly well.