Best 3653 quotes in «humorous quotes» category

I'll sleep when I'm dead.

I'll tell you how I'd like to be remembered: As a black man who won the heavyweight title - Who has humorous and who never looked down on those who looked up to him - A man who stood for freedom, justice and equality - And I wouldn't even mind if folks forgot how pretty I was.

I love bald men. Just because you've lost your fuzz don't mean you ain't a peach.

I love making people laugh, and to be able to be that humorous character was great. And I actually was very similar to Neville Longbottom. I was very shy and chubby-cheeked. I wasn't bullied at school, but I wasn't particularly outgoing. We were similar. And so I loved playing him.

I love my cigar too, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.

I love sharing my stories and experiences with people and connecting to them on both a humorous and emotional level.

I love the protest signs protected by the First Amendment - some of them humorous, some of them passionate, some factual, some entirely incorrect - all of them free ideas.

I love the very exposed, humorous, imperfect, never-trying to-pretend-to-be-perfect journey that I have been on in my life.

I'm a Christian-libertarian-environmentalist-capitalist-lunatic. It's a humorous way for me to describe that I'm not stereotypical.

I made myself platinum, but I was born a dirty blonde.

I'm always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can't understand is, if they don't know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is?

I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to it.

I'm a misplaced American, but don't know where I was misplaced

I'm at the age where I want two girls. In case I fall asleep they will have someone to talk to.

I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action.

I married a German. Every night I dress up as Poland and he invades me.

I mean you've got a conservative and right-winged press presence with really nothing on the other end of the political spectrum.

I mean, the question actors most often get asked is how they can bear saying the same things over and over again, night after night, but God knows the answer to that is, don't we all anyway; might as well get paid for it.

I'm easily persuaded that a really good novelist who gets inside somebody else's head could be serving a valuable purpose. I enjoy satirical novels that take a wry, humorous, ironic look at modern life.

I'm in Pittsburgh. Why am I here?

I'm for whatever gets you through the night

I'm halfway through a novel set in two time frames - Austin in the 1960's and Alpine (Texas) in present day. It started out to be a small, lighthearted, humorous book about family relationships; I was tired of writing war stories and tragedies.

I miss New York. I still love how people talk to you on the street - just assault you and tell you what they think of your jacket.

I misled people, including even my wife.

Imitation is the sincerest form of television.

I'm just trying to portray what I find ironic or humorous.

I'm just trying to suppress my natural impulses and get back to work.

I'm not a drinker, my body won't tolerate...eh...spirits, really. I had two martinis New Years Eve and I tried to hi-jack an elevator and fly it to Cuba.

I'm not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy.

I'm not a robot; I have a personality and I have emotions. I have a humorous side to me and an angry side to me.

I'm not going to parse the statement. You've got the statement I made earlier and the statement speaks for itself.

I'm so far gone that I'm telling the truth. It sounds like a foreign language.

I'm not overweight. I'm just nine inches too short.

I'm not saying that women don't think about sex also. I'm saying that women are capable, for at least brief periods of time, of not thinking about sex, and that most guys are not.

I'm pushing 60 years of age...and that's enough exercise for me.

I'm really interested in the link between creativity and humor because humor is a type of creativity, and I do think that humorous people and humorous health helps creativity.

I'm short enough and ugly enough to succeed on my own.

I'm sorry. I don't recall

I'm strong, I'm tough, I still wear my eyeliner.

I'm sure I spent more time in Texas than anybody else who had run for President recently.

I'm tired of hearing about innocent victims. It's fiction, If you live on this planet you're guilty, period, f*** you, next case, end of report. Your birth certificate is proof of guilt.

I must admit that I do have a particular soft spot for the character of the chameleon-trickster goddess Ris in Dreams of the Compass Rose. Ris has gone through the whole spectrum of personal change and has had the longest road of all. And in the end she chooses to come back to the world, to guide, and to help, and to open the eyes of those who are suffering. In that is her true strength and humorous wisdom. I really do like her a whole lot.

I'm very physical. I'm extremely active, and I would love to do something a little more sexy and dangerous, a la Sophia Loren, or funny and humorous, a la Woody Allen. Getting to do things along those lines would be extremely wicked and a dream come true.

In America any boy may become President, and I suppose it's just one of the risks he takes.

In addition I had real and serious questions about an independent counsel investigation that began with private business dealings twenty years ago

I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.

In closing, the greatest threat to peace on this earth is the arrogance of a super-power [America] that is out of control.

In business, the competition will bite you if you keep running; if you stand still, they will swallow you.

Indeed, so far from being humorous, the male American is the most abnormally serious creature who ever existed.. It is only fair to admit that he can exaggerate, but even his exaggeration has a rational basis. It is not founded on wit or fancy; it does not spring from any poetic imagination.

Indeed, it may be laid down as a general principle, that the more extended the ancestry, the greater the amount of violence and vagabondism; for in ancient days those two amusements, combining a wholesome excitement with a promising means of repairing shattered fortunes, were at once the ennobling pursuit and the healthful recreation of the Quality of this land.