Best 648 quotes in «comedian quotes» category

All of us black comedians are trying to be mainstream, but you don't want to lose the edge.

A lot of comedy clubs are set up with people sitting at little tables and you have everything from the way they are seated to them ordering or taking a sip of a drink, these can make a comedian go harder and faster in a club.

A lot of amazing comedians that I've worked with just really follow their instincts and you can't really teach someone comedic timing. And you just kind of have it.

A lot of comedians today have misunderstood the concept of a subversive comedian. If you really want to be subversive, you have to please and offend in equal amounts.

A lot of comedians, when they have a bad gig, will blame everything but themselves. They'll blame the crowd, or the room was wrong, it had a weird vibe, or the promoter promoted a weird atmosphere.

A lot of the comedians nowadays just do comedy as a stepping stone. Take for example Dane Cook. The guy is huge. The main reason he got into it is to do what he is doing now: film and television work.

A lot of the comedians don't even tell the joke. Like only three tell the joke, the rest of them dissect it.

A lot of us [comedians] are drawn to the stage or show business or whatever because we didn't feel so great about ourselves, and we didn't know how to do anything about that, so we sought external approval.

Although I had good hand-eye coordination, I was so tall and skinny and muscularly weak that I just was not well coordinated. But what I started to do quite early on was watch some of the great old silent comedians, like Laurel and Hardy and Chaplin, and then later on Harold Lloyd and Buster Keaton.

Am I the Irish comedian with half a finger? No, I'm the Irish comedian with nine and a half fingers.

And as Craig Brown - he's an English humorist, not a comedian but he's just a writer and humorist - I'm quite a fan of. I heard him talking in a rather similar way on the radio. He said I'm the sort of person - I can't remember exactly what he said, but it was rather interesting - he said I'm the sort of person that can be reduced to tears in an empty church and feel like I'm the CEO of the Devil's organization in a full one, and I tend to feel like that as well. I love empty churches and going into them looking around, but I'm not a churchgoer at all.

And I'm up while the dawn is breaking, even though my heart is aching. I should be drinking a toast to absent friends instead of these comedians.

As a comedian, I'm like one of those on-the-scene reporters. I will actually go and try to find disasters so I can write jokes as the disasters unfold.

Any comedian who tells you how dark and dangerous they are, they're not dark and dangerous.

Appurv Gupta brings you a unique point of view that no other comedian in India does. Well worth a watch.

As a comedian you are making yourself vulnerable in order to make others happy.

As a comedian, as an entertainer, there's a lot of downtime. Once you can accept that comedy is a marathon, not a sprint, it gets a little easier.

As a comedian, I have the gift of looking at something a bit differently and making it funny. I'm not sure why I can do that, but that's as simple as I can put it.

Ann Romney: 'The hardest part of being a stay at home mom was deciding which of our homes to stay at.'

As a comedian, as a person, as a citizen, as a mammal - in all of those areas, I am looking forward to the end of the Bush administration with every fiber of my being.

As a comedian, you're kind of like a blues musician; you have to live a little bit.

Ask any comedian, tennis player, chef. Timing is everything.

As comedians, we have the opportunity to convey a message that will have an effect. The best can make you laugh and cry, the way musicians and actors can.

Audiences have proved time and again that they don't want a steady diet of any entertainer airing his social views - especially if he's a comedian.

As much experience, education and awareness as one can attain is important for a comedian.

At a time when public finances are under huge strain, we surely do not need to pay celebrities to wax lyrical to mandarins. Unless American comedians can make the Home Office fit for purpose, the taxpayer won't be laughing.

At first, it was really weird after being a touring stand-up comedian that wears just jeans and a shirt. But now, it's almost like when you go from Clark Kent to Superman: "All right, I've got to go put on a suit and interview Justin Trudeau." It feels like it's part of the process. Oddly enough, I've been in enough places - they sometimes send you to places that are a bit scary - that I know how to run in a suit. Like, run fast.

At my funeral, I want Meryl Streep crying in five different accents.

Awards mean nothing to comedians. What matters is the audience, how you're doing - artistically, for the most part - at that moment.

A weird sort of awareness set in, like, 'Wow. My stand-up isn't just separate from everything else I do anymore.' With Twitter and Face book, everything is universal that everything everybody says gets seen.

Back when Jerry Seinfeld was just another comedian hanging around the clubs, I'd imitate him to amuse myself and the other comics. The club owners would say, 'What are you doing that for? Nobody knows him.'

Because I'm around comedians all the time, in my downtime I tend not to watch comedy. Something the whole family enjoys is 'You've Been Framed!' It satisfies all of us. It's universal, and we all laugh a lot.

Because you make me laugh don't make you a comic. A comedian is a person who, that's how they make their living.

Being a comedian, you're under pressure. You have to deal with stress and pressure to perform - to deal with pressure without stress.

Before doing my first open mic, I was sitting in the back watching all these comedians banter back and forth and fire jokes and up each other, and I thought, This is where I wanna be.

Being a comedian is like being a con man. You have to make 'em like you before you can fool 'em.

Being a comedian is an incredible thing, but it can be scary sometimes.

Being comedian outside of performing, you're someone who's analyzing life, and thinking about it, and observing so much. In my opinion, it can make you feel sort of on the outside looking in.

Being a successful person is not necessarily defined by what you have achieved, but by what you have overcome.

Being a TV comedian, actor, writer, columnist, and all that is quite helpful to me in acquiring wide varieties of knowledge, which is crucial for filmmaking.

Being a rapper is about being cool, but being a comedian, you're not supposed to be the coolest guy.

Being a teenager and figuring out who you are is hard enough without someone attacking you.

Bombing teaches you how badly you want to become a comedian. Because unless it's a burning desire, you'll quit when the consistent bombing becomes too much to take.

Branne's [Pavlovic] parents wanted him to become a taxi driver, but he became a stand-up comedian instead. So they died of shame.

Canada has been a breeding ground for great comedic actors, sketch artists and stand-up comedians. We grew up with a different perspective on the world.

But if applause throws off your timing, then you're not the kind of comedian I would like to see. All you have to do is stand there and take it.

But it's fun to be something, have that, and you don't have to be real. It's like, comedians. They go on and they're doing all these jokes. I would be like that if I were more awake

But I will say that most comedians are the saddest people I know. That is the biggest paradox to me.

By watching the great, old comedians I picked up a few tricks about how to do physical comedy. And whenever I could learn something, I sort of added that to my repertoire.

Catch Fire, Do Something, Get Excited by Finding Your Purpose In Life.