Best 648 quotes in «comedian quotes» category

Music takes us where words cannot.

My dad loved comedians, especially George Jessel, and he loved Henny Youngman and Buddy Hackett.

My favorite comedians were Jimmy Durante, George Burns, senior citizens.

My favorite, favorite, favorite, and the greatest comedian that could ever exist if you could Frankenstein a comedian together, would be one part Richard Pryor, one part Peter Sellers. That would be the greatest comic actor.

My grandfather was running Hillcrest Country Club, and that's where a whole group of Hollywood comedians hung out.

My greatest hope was to get discovered as a comedian and get on a sitcom.

My job as a comedian is to heighten awareness about locally grown produce, fight factory farming, and promote euthanasia, but in a funny way.

Nerd. One whose unbridled passion for something defines who they are as a person, without fear of other people's judgment.

My personal favorite is Woody Allen, who is just amazing as a comedian.

My theory about comedians is that their greatest fear is other people laughing at them. So comedy is an attempt to control and manipulate the thing they find most frightening.

My interest in magic was kindled by Steve Martin, the comedian I'd gone to high school with.

My preference is live performance. Because you get the feedback. There's an energy. It's live theater. That's why I think actors like that. You know, musicians need it, comedians definitely need it. It doesn't matter what size and what club, whether it's 30 people in the club or 2,000 in a hall or a theater. It's live, it's symbiotic, you need it.

Nietzsche says that we will live the same life, over and over again. God - I'll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.

Next time someone says, 'Where has big government ever gotten us?' the correct answer is 'Mars.'

Never really intended to be a comedian, just sort of fell into that, but always wanted to be in show business, or something to do with making comedy.

No wonder all the great comedians had such destructive private lives. ... After you get the audience into that kind of frenzy, and you are being worshiped like the false idol you are, how do you leave the stage and transition back into real life? ... What is there left to do but set yourself on fire?

No, I had not read any other comedian's book. Not that I don't enjoy other comedians; I'm just not a reader.

No matter how you feel, you've got to be able to laugh at yourself. If you can laugh at Donald Trump, then you better be able to laugh at yourself, too. For us as comedians, we have to point out what's funny.

Old radio comedy makes me laugh, as well as 'I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue' and comedians like Paul Merton.

Of the many qualities I adore about Melissa McCarthy as a comedian and as a dramatic actor, the best is how fully she gives herself to every character she plays.

Obviously those who burn to be professional jesters mean that they want to be successful comedians. And those are always an elite, microscopic portion of the population. But oh, how they try.

Oh yeah, I'd love to be a comedian. I've done a lot, but always in the confines of plays.

One can always lament, you know — but to laugh in the face of life, that's very hard. And for me the great tragedian should also be a great comedian.

Once or twice I`ve been described as a light comedian. I consider this the most accurate description of my abilities I`ve ever seen.

One of the problems I see with these comics on television, particularly cable television, is, since you can say anything in terms of sex and scatological references and so on, therefore, you should do it. So they all limit themselves to these subjects and this vocabulary. My objection is that it is a lack of articulateness. Irreverence is easy, but what is hard is wit. Wit is what these comedians lack.

One night I attended a Laughing Liberally comedy show. There was one funny comedian there - Lee Camp.

One of my first jobs was on a lesbian cruise. I was the ship comedian for the Lesbian Love Boat.

One of the things I used to dream of is that if I could just be funny like Red Skelton, if I could be a comedian like Red Skelton - that's what I watched on TV - then maybe I would have friends. I just remember that if I told stories to my friends, they listened. And in my family, with nine people talking at the same time, it's really hard to get people to listen to you. We were all craving attention.

Outsiders develop humor as a defense; why do you think most comedians are gay or Jewish?

Outside of performing, (a comedian) is someone who is analyzing life, thinking about it and trying to be observing so much. In my opinion, it can make you feel on the outside looking in.

Part of being a comedian is that it's your job to look at life and regurgitate it in a funny way, to point out its absurdities.

Pacifism is a nice idea but it can get you killed. We're not there yet. Evolution is slow, small pox is fast.

Pakistan hasn't been cast in the role of... interesting cultural place or, you know, land of great comedians.

People will kill you over time, and how they'll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases, like 'be realistic.'

Physics is very muddled again at the moment; it is much too hard for me anyway, and I wish I were a movie comedian or something like that and had never heard anything about physics!

Phyllis Diller came through a mine field of male comedians when she arrived on the comedy scene and she defused them all. She won her place in the Hall of Comedy as the First Lady. I will miss her.

Performers like Tommy Cooper, who are always getting things wrong, are much more endearing than comedians who are sassy and smart.

Philosophers, comedians, and tipsy birthday celebrants all have proposed theories about why time seems to move increasingly swiftly as we grow older. But the most disconcerting rationale is not a theory. It is the undeniable realization that every day we live constitutes a smaller percentage of the accrued experience with which we awaken each morning, and therefore seems proportionately a smidgen quicker and smaller than the day before.

Politics is developing more comedians than radio ever did.

Ricky Gervais would have you believe otherwise, but Sacha Baron Cohen is the most successful British comedian in the world.

Professional comedians, surprisingly, have a lack of humor. They're insensitive to the insanity of our times.

Remember, folks, I am a comedian, not a journalist.

Really good comedians, you know, when they go on stage, they don't really care what the audience - they're fearless, you know? They're so comfortable that they don't care. They don't have that neediness where they need the laughs.

Reggie Watts is a most unusual talent: a huge vocal range, a natural musicality, and a sidesplitting wit. Is he a comedian? A singer? A performance artist? I've seen him a few times since then and I still can't decide. Whatever, he ain't like nobody else.

Some comedians tell nice jokes that you can tell to your kids. Some use bad words - they work 'blue.' If you don't want to hear a joke that's blue, you shouldn't go to a comedy club where a comedian who makes blue jokes is performing.

Roxanne came along in '86, when I was doing a lot of stand-up. I auditioned for the movie, and of course I was a huge Steve Martin fan, so I really hoped I would get this part. I don't think there was any part in particular that I auditioned for. I just went in and talked with them. There were so many parts in there, and so many comedians ended up getting in that movie, playing different firemen and townspeople.

Some comedians love their characters. I don't fall in love with mine. In fact, I get tired of them very fast. You have to be willing to throw it all away.

Sarah Palin has decided not to run for President and go straight to the quitting part.

So I kept it to myself. Then some of my classmates started to come down to the comedy club, taking a girl out, and they started finding out I was a stand-up comedian.

Some comedians change their style, often to their advantage; but I see no reason why I can't continue with the "urbane sophisticate" 'til the day I die.